A teeny tiny prayer request...

DH's mom, Terry, is going to have heart surgery on August 7th. We don't know how extensive it will be til they go in there. It will be A. a quick look around, a-ok, then angioplast, B. A stent put in to keep the ticker hummin', or C. A bypass surgery. It all depends on what they find, and they figure once they have her under, they should proceed with whatever she needs.

DH's dad requested everyone's presence, and at first, DH was very unwilling to go. This sounds harsh, but the bad blood is pretty severe, and when there is a long stint of nobody talking to each other, it gets worse, oftentimes, because imaginations run wild about what the other person might be thinking. DH's brother intended to go. I figured eventually DH would be won over, and he has been.

His dad called this week and convinced him to go with his brother, so they are both going to see their parents Friday-Saturday this coming week, after the surgery. I do hope it goes well. This is a very difficult situation in which there is a lot of guilt, bad feelings, offense taken where none was intended, and continued "hurt party syndrome".

I decided to let it alone quite a long time ago, since nothing I do ever helps, in fact it often makes it worse. My lack of knowledge about "how things should be" is often the culprit. If you are a "good son" or even "good daughter in law", apparently you do exactly as you are told in certain asian families. I'm not even close to asian. If anything, I was raised redneck. In a barn. Usually in a 1975 Ford F-250. Orange and white. Steering by bungee cord. No, I'm not kidding.

DH and I have made it work, probably to the ongoing surprise of many family and friends. We are very happy after nine years of marriage, most days of the week. It gets better every year, I'd like to think. But the situation with DH's family usually gets worse. I hear we are not the only ones, and it doesn't even have to be a "culture thing" to be this way. So I accept it for what it is, and continue to keep the kids out of it.

Please pray for ongoing patience, saintly levels of kindness (nod head and smile anyway), and love, most of all. A change of heart would be good to pray for, but I think I've given up on that. One must accept a person for who they are if they aren't going to change, and at a certain age, expecting change is just plain silly.

Please pray for a safe trip and happy thoughts, and a lack of stress.

I love you, honey! And you, too, Uncle Deet.