Prayers for Rachel, Matt and Peter Stull

Below is a letter I sent tonight to a lot of people. Rachel, I hope everyone prays like crazy. I know I will be, and I love you, and I will pray for St. Anthony, your favorite, to hold your hand while you are scared and worried. God bless and keep you and angels watch over you. You are a better friend than I know I deserve, and always have been.
Ann Marie

Hello Everyone,
So, here goes, ready for another prayer warrior request? For clarification, this is the Rachel of Savoy and del Rosario friendship, it is not either of the Felderhoff Rachel's or the Rachel in Rosary Group. Some folks may not know the long saga behind this, so let me sum up a bit. I've known Rachel since she was a freshman at Gonzaga U.and I was a sophomore. She graduated from U. or Oregon later on, and we've been friends for nearly 13 years now. In fact, she introduced me to Eileen Savoy, and between Eileen and the Wieber's, that is why we now live in Everett and are part of the Rosary group. Sadly, Rachel and her husband Matt (whom I knew in high school), moved to Olympia.
Rachel has had many problems over the years with pain, food allergies, endometriosis (very painful), and infertility. She had surgery in Seattle and then drug therapies following, and was able to have their son, Peter, who is now 15 months old. She is back to being in a lot of pain, which seems to be nerve pain having to do with endometriosis, but her new doctor is not even sure it is endometriosis til they check by surgery. They have a very uncooperative insurance plan, too. They can't afford to go to Pope Paul VI Institute, where Eileen had a similar surgery. But they did find out about a doctor in Bend, OR, who has a very good track record. He's written books on endo. like crazy and everyone she talks to as she makes arrangements seems to know someone who has had their miracle because of him. She went on Saturday to see him, and would you believe it, they had an opening for surgery on Tuesday next week. Despite heavy snow and costs, they are going for the surgery, leaving on Sunday. She won't be able to do much for a month afterwards.
Luckily, someone donated all the money to cover costs since their insurance won't. Also, the homeschooling group down there will be sending teenagers and others her way to help around the house and with Peter until she can move. She also has her mom and mom-in-law to help. I just pray that this results in no more pain and possibly a baby. The pain is getting to be too much to handle sanely, so please pray for her this week, and I'll send updates as I get them. She might not have time to call for now, but she will have email where she is going. Right now, it's all about preparations. All kinds of things have moved them in this direction, and that in itself is miraculous. Keep up the good prayers! She's already had many answered, but I really want to see a happy Rachel again someday.
God bless,
Ann Marie del Rosario

Admit it, you wish you could do this at least once a day, right?

This is a forward from my dad. Thanks, Dad!

more fun adoption stuff

Guess what I found as an advertisement on facebook? This is kinda cute. I like this shirt the best!

http://adoptionmama.com/catalog.php?item=4&catid=1&ret=catalog.php%3Fpage%3D2%26category%3D1

Uh oh, this blog has strong competition...

Tee hee.
I think everyone should check this out. It's likely to get better and better, depending on how much time Ethel has for it.
http://ellisontwins.blogspot.com/

I'll get back to you soon, Ethel, and happy househunting!

Foster care thoughts

I've been mulling over this for a couple of days, and I think I'm ready to write it down. We'll see what really happens here...
First of all, I want to say that our experience of foster care was worth it, and that, given a bigger house, we might (I say, MIGHT) consider doing it again. We have one adopted child and three biological children. We did foster care on and off from late 2001 until the present, when I personally am still on record as having a respite license. During that time we have had four actual placements, and two of those were for only a few days. One we kept. One we didn't. Her name is Nikkole, and she is six. She is probably somewhere between Arlington and Everett, and I hope she's not back in foster care, but no social worker who knows anything will call me back. So I keep praying instead. As it is, she wouldn't fit well into our family if we did get her back, and we have no room right now anyway. So I should probably not obsess. However, it still feels like a loss. We wonder if she's ok and we miss her. We had several other respite placements, a week or a few days at a time, and they have been adopted and all is going well!
I don't want people to get the wrong impression of how things go. Here's what you most need to know: The POINT of foster care is to GIVE THEM BACK to their parents. The point is not to adopt them. If that happens, great! If you are going into foster care with the intent to adopt, that's also great. One great feature is that it is free. We fronted $600 for the adoption, and got a check reimbursing us the next week. BUT, you might not get to keep a kid placed in your care. You need to go into it knowing that. Otherwise, you are setting yourself and that child up for nothing good. There are many books written on this subject, and your library or www.tapestrybooks.com is a good place to start. If you are in it to adopt, try to adopt a child who is already legally free, with paperwork terminating parental rights (TPR). Northwest Adoption Exchange has a website and it's a very honest one. I'm glad, because a lot of these kids have serious problems.
Now, the personal part of this post is about a certain family who has two foster kids right now. They have had them for nearly a year. They have done an amazing job as foster parents, and they are completely and utterly aware of the chance that one or both of these children may go back. But they continue to shower them with love and affection, and take pictures like crazy people, as if they were legally their children. Recent conversations have led us to believe that it is possible that one of the children will go back to a birth parent, and one of them won't. This is going to be tremendously hard on the kids, because once a child goes back, the foster parent may not want to be in touch with that birth parent. Many reasons for this exist. Most cases of foster care include drug or alcohol abuse, lack of normal social boundaries, or domestic violence. These are not people you want to share your address and phone number with. And so siblings do lose contact. This is very hard on children, but sometimes it is necessary. The hard part with this situation also is that these children now have lots of friends. Because of privacy laws, we really can't stay in touch with any kid who is returned. So all of our friends in our prayer group will not be able to see them anymore, and our kids will be sad about this. We will have pictures and memories, but no visits.
One thing that can and does happen (our godchild is a prime example), is that a child, once returned, comes back into foster care within a year. The parents try and fail again. Usually, the state will call the last known foster parent, but not always (as in our case with Nikkole). It's possible this child will come back.
If you ever want to experience and roller coaster of emotions, this is definitely it.
Is it worth it? YES. We are making a difference to these children. It is not, ultimately, about us. It is about them. If they had even a year of normal family life, then they at least know what they are looking for and know what can be. Someday they may find it again.
Meanwhile, for readers who know what I'm talking about, please pray for the girl I'm referring to. We hope God's will be done, but we don't know what or why it is. There is no way to know until the judge signs the final papers, and if they are returned, that still might not be the end.
Keep up the hard work, all you foster parents out there. It's a good, hard, worthy road.

Why God Made Moms

Apparently someone asked some second graders what they thought about the following questions. I have seen things like this before, but not too many that made me laugh like this one does. Our friend Kamie used to work in Gabe's classroom when he was in daycare, and when she asked questions like this of three year old's, well, those answers are worth a zillion dollars. I need to frame what she made before it gets destroyed. It was hilarious.

In the meantime:

WHY GOD MADE MOMS

Answers given by 2nd grade school children to the following questions:

R>Why did God make mothers?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
NT>

What ingredients are mothers made of ?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.

Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1. We're related.
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.

What kind of little girl was your mom?
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.

What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

Why did your mom marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.

Who's the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.

What's the difference between moms & dads?
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. <
/SPAN>

What does your mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your mom perfect?
1. On the inside she's already perfect Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your mom, what would
it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.

WHEN YOU STOP LAUGHING --
SEND IT ON TO OTHER MOTHERS, GRANDMOTHERS, AUNTS
and anyone else who has anything to do with kids or just needs a good laugh

Remember the old Superman movies?

Francis just sent me this, and I leave it up to you to choose the best candidate... :)
I can't believe someone made this website. Really. And yet I can.
I forgot who this guy even was, until I scrolled down for more pictures. This is sooooo funny.

http://www.zod2008.com/

Thanks, Dave!

This picture is of Bonnie on her high school graduation, and I and Ramona are on either side of her.

My dear brother in law, Dave, was very smart and got me a present from here:

http://www.charitygiftcertificates.org

and I donated his money here:

http://www.autismspeaks.org

which has paired up with NAAR, and they both raise money and awareness for autism research so that someday, we might find out what happened to all these people. It's quite a mystery, and there are lots and lots of opinions, but not much science. Treatment for autism that really works (ABA Applied Behavior Analysis) with a private person costs around $20,000 according to what I read this week in the Seattle Times. The only insurance I know of that covers it is the policy that covers folks who work at Microsoft. So if you're a really lucky autistic kid, your parents work at Microsoft. ARGH.

Why do I care? Because my sister is autistic. No, Ramona, I'm not going to embarrass you right here on my blog with all the things you did when you were little. It sure is tempting, but I'll keep that knowledge more or less to myself. Boy, was it interesting to live at our house, though.
I'm so proud of Ramona, though. She lives on her own, she can cook and clean and work, and while she still struggles with things like making friends, she is doing ten times better than I or our parents had hoped.

Go, Ramona, Go. I'll always be proud of you!

There are some other charities on the website, but not all ones I would contribute to. Enjoy!

Mariah's pool party

I just have to post these pics. Rikki-san has a better camera than I do. I have camera lust. I can't wait til Feb. 1 because we'll finally have a windfall from stock dividends, and a very small amount is going toward a nice, new camera. We have composed a plan for the windfall: 40% to debt, 40% to savings, 10% each for us to spend. We've agreed that we will each take a piece of our personal 10% and put up black out blinds in the bedrooms when it comes. At last! It's good to have a plan so we don't just fritter it away. And then I'll get a MODG check, and we can do the same thing again. Savings at last! Eight years of marriage, and by golly, I think we've got it!
It helps to keep credit cards in the safe.

These pictures are from a pool party for Mariah. It was awesome! No presents, no cake, just fun with lots of mommies and daddies and kids. Forest Park must wonder if it's been invaded by crazy Catholics, both for parties and at swimming lessons. Yup, I joined a cult, alright.

A Second Look

Wow. You gotta see this:

www.secondlookproject.org is a website that revisits what we know about abortion in the U.S. Apparently Planned Parenthood is not happy. Why? These are facts. Really. If PP and people who support them are proud to be pro-choice, why do so many of them hide facts, or hide their support? If I was proud of something, I'd shout it to the skies! And I am!!

Another super amazing website is www.standupgirl.com. Girls who decide to keep their babies can tell you how it turned out.

Thanks to Michelle for posting this on her website. If you'd like check out Michelle, too, visit her at www.lifeoftheparty.typepad.com. I think Michelle's biggest strength is that she has already tried the liberal, feminist "real life" that supposedly is the best for everyone, and found out it is a lie. She wants everyone to know it, and she's got some neat stuff on her site that might just turn your head. She's especially good at inserting video!
Enjoy!

Clone Wars

This really, really disturbs me. I would really like to think that we aren't moving in this direction, and I hope that someday soon it blows up in our faces so that there will be a "non-proliferation treaty" for cloning that will slow things down. The implications are very, very scary. If it's ok to create humans for use, how is that different from using humans for slavery, or prostitution? Or to kill for fun? Nazi doctors were doing things like this, but now it's ok. WHAT?!
Pray hard, people.

Scientists make human embryo clones

05:58 PM PST on Thursday, January 17, 2008

Associated Press

Video

Scientists clone human embryo

NEW YORK - Scientists in California say they have produced embryos that are clones of two men, a potential step toward developing scientifically valuable stem cells.

The new report documents embryos made with ordinary skin cells. But it's not the first time human cloned embryos have been made. In 2005, for example, scientists in Britain reported using embryonic stem cells to produce a cloned embryo. It matured enough to produce stem cells, but none were extracted.

Stem cells weren't produced by the new embryos either, and because of that, experts reacted coolly to the research.

"I found it difficult to determine what was substantially new," said Doug Melton of the Harvard Stem Cell Institute. He said the "next big advance will be to create a human embryonic stem cell line" from cloned embryos. "This has yet to be achieved."

Dr. George Daley of the Harvard institute and Children's Hospital Boston called the new report interesting but agreed that "the real splash" will be when somebody creates stem cell lines from cloned human embryos.

"It's only a matter of time before some group succeeds," Daley said.

Korean scientist Hwang Woo-suk claimed a few years ago that he'd created such cell lines, but that turned out to be a fraud.

Dr. Samuel Wood, a co-author of the new paper and chief executive of Stemagen Corp. of La Jolla, Calif., said he and his colleagues are now attempting to produce stem cell lines from the embryos.

The work was published online Thursday by the journal Stem Cells.

Scientists say stem cells from cloned embryos could provide a valuable tool for studying diseases, screening drugs and, perhaps someday, creating transplant material to treat conditions like diabetes and Parkinson's disease.

But critics raise objections. The process "involves creating human lives in the laboratory solely to destroy them for alleged benefit to others," said Richard Doerflinger, spokesman for the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops.

Citing the earlier work in Britain, he also said that as a scientific advancement, the new work was "very limited."

Other objections to cloning include concerns about health risks and exploitation if large numbers of women are asked to provide eggs.

Those objections are one reason that an alternative route to stem cells made headlines last November. Scientists reported a relatively simple way to turn skin cells directly into stem cells. This direct reprogramming carries a theoretical risk of cancer for the recipients of tissue from these cells, however, and many scientists have urged that work continue on the cloning technique as well.

The cloning approach involves inserting DNA from a person into an egg, and then growing the egg into an embryo about five days old before extracting the stem cells. At that stage, the embryo is a sphere of about 150 cells.

In the new work, researchers took skin cells from Wood and another volunteer and produced three embryos with DNA matching the men's. Further DNA testing on one of these embryos strengthened the case that it was a clone, researchers said.

More babies!

Congratulations to Kerry and Justin Racht, whose first baby, Liam Donovan Racht, was born on January 11th in or near Providence, Rhode Island. I know Kerry from working at MDA camp one summer in Spokane, WA, with our friend Joshua Mayer.



Congratulations to Stacie and Josh Webb, whose third baby, Kyle James Webb, was born on January 14th at Valley Medical Center in Renton, WA. My husband knows Stacie from Gonzaga, and we became friends after college. She was our best man. I'm not kidding, she even wore a tux. I think Francis is going to have some very, very cold payback one of these days.
Come to think of it, I wonder when Beth is going to pay everyone back for this birthday I heard about? Ah, the things I missed, not meeting my husband until my senior year.
On second thought, maybe that's a good thing. Some things are not "you had to be there" kinds of things... :)
Yay for babies!

Open letter to those in crisis pregnancy situations

I put this up on facebook, then decided I should put it here, too. I am the master of the human connection, ya know. Actually, God is the master of that, but for some reason, He entrusted part of His job to me. It's starting to rub off on my husband, too. He calls me "God's router". What a geek! :)
Here you go, pass it on!

Hi All,
I was just thinking another of my random thoughts, but I thought I'd write it down here, for you never know when this kind of information will come in handy. If anyone reading this or anyone they know became pregnant and had no idea if they wanted to keep it, if they should tell their relatives, or if they should go see Planned Parenthood or possibly a Crisis Pregnancy Center, I would like to volunteer to connect you to people who might help. This year we have had the honor of becoming godparents to two kids adopted from foster care (Hi Stephan and Paige!) and we know another family who hopes to adopt two others this year. Another family is getting their foster care license any minute. I know two families who can't have any more birth children and can't afford astronomical private adoption fees, but they would completely adopt a child in need if they met in person. That situation came up this year when a friend of a friend had a daughter who didn't know what to do, and people were lined up to adopt if need be. The woman decided to keep her baby after all, but we knew someone safe would take the baby. We also know one other family who's been looking for a baby forever, but birth parents keep deciding to keep the baby instead of letting them have it -- heartbreak city!
These are the kinds of things you might not learn about in the news or from Planned Parenthood. There are tons of people out there doing foster care because they can't afford to adopt ($20,000!) but have a loving home and want lots of kids. Please spread the word, and keep your options open. There is always hope and love. So let that baby live!

Life Explained

Ok, it's a forward from my email that my mom sent me, but it's so funny I have to post it here. I think I did mention that this blog would cut down on how tempted I am to forward things to people, right?
In any case, this explains it all.

On the first day, God created the dog and said:
> 'Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at
> anyone who comes in
> or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span
> of twenty years.'
>
> The dog said: 'That's a long time to be barking. How
> about only ten
> years and I'll give you back the other ten?'
>
> So God agreed.
>
> On the second day, God created the monkey and said:
> 'Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh.
> For this, I'll give
> you a twenty-year life span.'
>
> The monkey said: 'Monkey tricks for twenty years?
> That's a pretty long
> time to perform. How about I give you back ten like
> the Dog did?'
>
> And God agreed.
>
> On the third day, God created the cow and said:
>
> 'You must go into the field with the farmer all day
> long and suffer
> under the sun, have calves and give milk to support
> the farmer's family.
> For this, I will give you a life span of sixty
> years.'
> The cow said: 'That's kind of a tough life you want
> me to live for sixty
> years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other
> forty?'
>
> And God agreed again.
>
> On the fourth day, God created man and said:
>
> 'Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For
> this, I'll give you
> twenty years.'
>
> But man said: 'Only twenty years? Could you possibly
> give me my twenty,
> the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave
> back, and the ten
> the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?'
>
> 'Okay,' said God, 'You asked for it.'
>
> So that is why for our first twenty years we eat,
> sleep, play and enjoy
> ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the
> sun to support our
> family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks
> to entertain the
> grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on
> the front porch and
> bark at everyone.
>
> Life has now been explained to you.
>
> There is no need to thank me for this valuable
> information. I'm doing it
> as a public service.
> 

FBI doesn't pay its phone bill...

Ok, I had to post another funny news article. How is this possible?? Ok, that's a silly question. It's the government.
Enjoy!

FBI Wiretaps Dropped Due to Unpaid Bills
Email this Story

Jan 10, 12:27 PM (ET)

By LARA JAKES JORDAN

WASHINGTON (AP) - Telephone companies have cut off FBI wiretaps used to eavesdrop on suspected criminals because of the bureau's repeated failures to pay phone bills on time.

A Justice Department audit released Thursday blamed the lost connections on the FBI's lax oversight of money used in undercover investigations. Poor supervision of the program also allowed one agent to steal $25,000, the audit said.

In at least one case, a wiretap used in a Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act investigation "was halted due to untimely payment," the audit found. FISA wiretaps are used in the government's most sensitive and secretive criminal investigations, and allow eavesdropping on suspected terrorists or spies.

"We also found that late payments have resulted in telecommunications carriers actually disconnecting phone lines established to deliver surveillance results to the FBI, resulting in lost evidence," according to the audit by Inspector General Glenn A. Fine.

More than half of 990 bills to pay for telecommunication surveillance in five unidentified FBI field offices were not paid on time, the report shows. In one office alone, unpaid costs for wiretaps from one phone company totaled $66,000.

The FBI did not have an immediate comment.

The report released Thursday was a highly edited version of Fine's 87-page audit that the FBI deemed too sensitive to be viewed publicly. It focused on what the FBI admitted was an "antiquated" system to track money sent to its 56 field offices nationwide for undercover work. Generally, the money pays for rental cars, leases and surveillance, the audit noted.

It also found that some field offices paid for expenses on undercover cases that should have been financed by FBI headquarters. Out of 130 undercover payments examined, auditors found 14 cases of at least $6,000 each where field offices dipped into their own budgets to pay for work that should have been picked up by headquarters.

The faulty bookkeeping was blamed, in large part, in the case of an FBI agent who pleaded guilty in June 2006 to stealing $25,000 for her own use, the audit noted.

"As demonstrated by the FBI employee who stole funds intended to support undercover activities, procedural controls by themselves have not ensured proper tracking and use of confidential case funds," it concluded.

Fine's report offered 16 recommendations to improve the FBI's tracking and management of the funding system, including its telecommunication costs. The FBI has agreed to follow 11 of the suggestions but said that four "would be either unfeasible or too cost prohibitive." The recommendations were not specifically outlined in the edited version of the report.

Go Mom Go!

Except, I think I would have gone with Oprah...

Public warms to "uncool" mom

By Monica Hesse

The Washington Post

PREV of NEXT

SCREEN GRAB

Jane Hambleton and son Stephen on "Good Morning America," where she told about selling his car after finding booze under the front seat.

Yesterday, she was the meanest mom on the planet. Today: the coolest.

Jane Hambleton, 48, gained a worshipful parental following after news of a classified ad she had placed in The Des Moines Register was picked up by The Associated Press. The text of the ad:

"OLDS 1999 Intrigue. Totally uncool parents who obviously don't love teenage son, selling his car. Only driven for three weeks before snoopy mom who needs to get a life found booze under front seat. $3,700/offer. Call meanest mom on the planet."

Sold! Hambleton, a radio DJ in Fort Dodge, Iowa, received some 70 calls from buyers.

And other parents. And emergency-room workers. And school counselors. And scores of others wanting to congratulate her for being so Dirty Harry awesome.

"I don't think you can print" what Steven, 19, said to his mom, she told The Register. But then the two became instantly famous, and by Thursday morning they were appearing on "Good Morning America," which got the television-booking wars started, as ABC producer Chad Parks recounted it. "Today" wanted them.

The Hambletons were about to book that when folks from "The Oprah Winfrey Show" called, demanding exclusivity, so the family leaned toward that, Mom being a huge Oprah fan.

But then Ellen DeGeneres called. And while Mom likes Winfrey, her son loves DeGeneres, and Mom was inclined to give this one to her son, considering she had taken away his car. They were going back to Iowa to sort it all out.

All of which proved one thing: America needed this kind of tough love, the kind that says: "I am not your friend. I am your mother. Eat your peas. Now."

The kind that says: "I don't care what the other mothers are doing. I am not buying a pony keg for your party, even if I take away the keys to make sure your friends don't drive home plastered."

For the record, Steven, a student at Briar Cliff University in Sioux City, told his mother the alcohol in the car did not belong to him, but to a friend. For the record, Hambleton believed him. But it violated one of two rules she'd set forth when she bought him the car: No booze, and keep it locked.

Her son was originally "very, very unhappy," The Register reported, but he and Mom seem to have patched things up. It's amazing what a free trip to New York can do.

Mostly reflections on wedded bliss

But first, now I temporarily have no one to vote for. Huckabee is apparently very like his predecessor who was also from Hope, Arkansas! If you look up what Mary Pride has to say, you will find it. She has written some great homeschooling how-to books. You have to be a slippery eel to get endorsements from both the NEA (National Education Assoc.) and HSLDA (the Home School Legal Defense Assoc.). NEA has plenty of untrue and biased, awful things to say about homeschoolers, and while I wish we "could all just get along" and learn from each other, I think it's fair to say that the two associations are diametrically opposed. So he is very likely saying what folks want to hear. But what would happen if he got into office? Something tells me he'd be paralyzed by pleasing everyone.
Hmmm... moving on to Romney? I guess I'll check him out next. I really detest how every voting year, I end up voting against people instead of for someone I believe in. I vote for a person so someone worse won't get in. Argh.
Ok.
I got my CCL magazine called Family Foundations yesterday. The topic is how to keep marriages strong, and why they fail even if people have "done everything right". Even if they went to prep classes, waited a long time before getting married, practice NFP, and have nice stable incomes, a lot of time the marriage is not that happy. The top reason was the balance of work and family life, it turns out, not what you'd have expected, like sex, money or kids. I can well believe that. I ticked off my husband by saying we shouldn't have him working toward another tech certification yet. I said that because he just finished (and passed, yay!) his Windows Vista cert., and it took four months of constant studying, and no time to spend with his kids without thinking how much he wasn't studying. I like our family life, and I know that the certs will help him get that uber well paying job, but we need to pace ourselves! Of course, he wasn't mad once I gave him this long explanation, but why do we jump into being mad right away? Habit, I think. It would be better to assume the other person has your best interest at heart, but I don't think either of us act as if we believed that, even if we do.
Marriage is a hard thing! It's very worth it, but my, my, it's a lot of work.
My favorite part of this month's issue of Family Foundations is when a bride who has always been "open to life" says how she reacted to finding out she was pregnant right away. I simply must quote her, because it sounds SO familiar.
From Family Foundations, Volume 34, No. 4, pg. 18 "When 'Open to Life' becomes more than words":
First, much like us, except we were just being lazy, and it was two months after our wedding:
"Without more serious reasons to postpone, however, we relaxed our application of NFP rules. We conceived a week after our first anniversary. Life stopped traffic, we didn't even see it coming until the brake lights went rampant.... 'Open to life' was suddenly more than words, but a concrete reality in my own body."
"I'm ashamed to admit my reactions when, after 21 days of temperature rise, we realized it was time to call the doctor and ask what in the world we were supposed to do next. We were pregnant! I cried. I broke down in a weeping heap of fears, uncertainty, denial, dismay, and a complete lack of trust in God. I was mired in things of the world like, "Will my college education go to waste?", "Will we be able to afford a baby?" "What about a house?" I was in the midst of that traffic jam with no way out.
"My husband was less than thrilled with my dramatics, as I had always been the one to talk up "openness to live" and "children are a blessing." After a few days of prayer and discussion, our marriage bond helped to replace the fear and anxiety with excitement and uncertainty. This uncertainty, at least, was permeated with anticipation. In hindsight, the perfection and intricacy of God's plan is so evident, but by golly when you're in the midst, blinded by fear, you can only see a backed up mess with no direction that looks promising."

I quoted a lot here, because she summed up our initial feelings nicely. Gabe was a huge blessing in a very big disguise. When he was born, we didn't even know where either of us would be working two months later. And yet we found jobs, and we struggled through several more years of craziness, but it always worked out and now there are four kids and I get to homeschool them, just like I wanted to.
Lesson learned: Trusting that it will all work out is very important. I have seen people take that a little too far, almost like they are testing God to see if He'll come through for them. But if you are having a hard time, see if there was some good that came of it. In our case, it got us out of teaching, which Francis hated, and forced us to meet people and do things we wouldn't have done otherwise. If money comes later, I am fine with that. Now that staying pregnant is difficult and two miscarriages later, I'm glad we got started when we did, or we might never have had children at all. God is so good.

more politics and facebook

This one is liable to ramble quite a bit, so watch out. There. You've been warned. I cannot be held liable for your confused state... just mine.
So. I keep looking at presidential candidates. I'm relieved to see that Hillary and Rudy are having a tough go of it, and I hope sincerely that that continues. It might be that we get less news over here, being in the western states, because when they do the tallying up of votes, they always call the race before we're even done over here. I guess we don't count, even though CA is over here. Huh. But anyway, I'm still not so sure about Ron Paul. I want to be sure, but his foreign policy is just to drastic. It's the only thing I disagree on, but I really, really disagree, and it's rather important. You can't just yank all the bases and yank all our troops from all over the world. First of all, it's impossible unless he's planning a dictatorship, because congress won't let that happen. So secondly, he's making promises he most certainly cannot keep. I'm glad Huckabee did so well in Iowa, and I wonder if Romney or McCain will do better in NH tonight. No way to know how it will all play out. However, it does appear Obama has quite a loyal following. I don't know if he has the know-how to pull this off, but it sure would be interesting to see such a different kind of person in the white house. I still prefer him over Hillary. Anybody but her!
On to Facebook:
I have a Facebook account. It is kind of fun, and has reunited me with several people from back in high school as well as college people who have been all over since I last saw them. It's quite enlightening. One of the most stark examples of change has been one friend who was in ROTC at Gonzaga, and now she is an episcopalian priest and so is her husband, who is a former circus performer (eats fire). She looks very happy! But wow!
Facebook is also the only reliable source of information from my rather uncommunicative sister. Ahem. If you are reading this, yes, I'm referring to you.
But in any case, what really irks me right now is stuff that is completely beyond my control. Nearly everyone on there is LIBERAL with great big, Hollywood sized letters. If they were liberal in high school, they are much more so now. Holy Toledo. My conundrum is this. I know NFP works. I know it makes marriages better, but I know that both NFP and marriage takes work and determination not to quit when the going gets tough. They both require a person to take the long view and put off what they want sometimes for quite a while. I know it's worth it. I'd like to share that with people. But then I see that they support Planned Parenthood and frequent gay parades with lots of rainbows, and I wonder if I should even start a conversation with "Hey, I noticed you support PP. I was standing in front of it this fall getting yelled at by people like you. What gives?". I mean, should I do that? Is it even worth it? What can I say that might break through the fog of "sex is a god"?
Any advice greatly appreciated.
Meanwhile, I'm re-reading The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis when I'm nursing Dominic, and it's worth another read. It makes me realize what is going on from time to time in the world unseen by me, and reminds me that I'm just as prone to the dumb tricks of demons as anyone else. I also like the reminder that Satan is not the opposite of God, he's the opposite of St. Michael the Archangel. He can't be the opposite of his Creator. He's a fallen angel, not omnipresent like God. I wonder how many people even realize that if they even bother to think of angels and demons. I bet it allows demons a lot of room for their plots if people continue to dismiss the idea the way they do...
Which reminds me. Since baby Savoy is named Michael, I really need to find some St. Michael gear, right Eileen?

Happy New Year! A fresh start...

First, I'd like to start with a quote from a bookmarked blog I ran into, called Large Family Logistics. I need to make a list of favorite blogs, but haven't yet. However, that might happen because ... TA DA! I corrected all my papers! More on that some other time...
Here are two irresistible quotes:

"How can you have too many children? That's like saying there are too many flowers" - Mother Teresa

"Women should not have children after 35; thirty-five children are enough." - anonymous
I love it! That said, my mom sent me two very interesting books for Christmas. One is called The Empty Cradle and it is about how the world has been a little overzealous about minimizing population growth, and how we will be alarmed to find there are not enough people to pay to do the services we are going to need as we grow older. It includes quite a few historical references that say that the baby boom was a large anomaly, and that the population of people has been declining since the late 1800's. It makes a lot of very valid points, and says a lot about governments and political systems making it hard to realize the dream of having children. I agree with this. It takes some practice "tipping reality on its side" to realize you can afford them, but you have to make mental and physical sacrifices to realize that it really is ok. Some faith that things will turn out helps, too, though one can take that too far as well. Everything can be taken too far by someone.
In any case, the book is a secular and well informed book that makes the case that our not having kids is going to really wreck our world for a while. I'm of the opinion that everything will straighten itself out eventually, but that might take 100 years or so. I'll include some quotes from the book later.
The other one is called Perfect Madness and it illustrates the craziness that overtakes parents of all stripes, not just rich or poor ones, but all of them. I thought it didn't apply to me, but it does. I stay out of most rat races that parents partake in (unless I want to, not because I feel like I've got to), like formal birthday parties, formal schooling, formal playgroups and preschools. And yet, I do go crazy keeping up with my own standards. How about you? It is good to be self-reflective once in a while and have that reality check, and yet, that too can be overdone!
The more I learn the dumber I feel because I didn't know it already. And then I have even more questions, and realize I will never, ever be bored ever again. How in the world can one be bored? Lack of imagination? I mean, really!
Rambling over. You may commence with your new year. Happy 2008!
Oh, were you going to ask about a new year's resolution? Ours is to understand finance and budgeting, and how it applies to us. We are using a book called America's Cheapest Family, and it's awesome! Read it!